From Zambia: Breaking the Norm

One of the biggest cultural differences that has stood out to me during my time here is the immense amount of gender inequality. By gender inequality I don’t just mean that men get paid more than women, it is an all encompassing term in every aspect of a Zambian's life. Here men are superior, it is considered shameful if a man is helping his wife cook or clean, men are allowed to not work and typically spend their money on alcohol while the women go find whatever work they can get. One of the most sickening things here is that abuse is very common and so common in fact, that it has almost become a norm. A discussion that we had with a former teacher at the school had him inform us that if a wife asks a husband if he can help her clean, that gives him a reason to beat her. Awful. A reform against this gender inequality appears to be in sight as there are very prominent billboards all over the place advertising the necessity to stop all forms of abuse, one can only hope that this means change is on the horizon.

Anyways, one of the many reasons why I love RHO Appleseed is that it is run by women and these women give so much to the school and the kids. Mary, who I have written about in past blogs, is the director of the school. Before being given this position, which comes with authority and power, Mary worked as a house cleaner and was in a very bad marriage. Because of the encouragement and motivation she has developed since starting her work at the school she has been able to end her marriage and now is one of the most confident and strong-willed people I have ever met. Mary often says how the men here are just overall bad, and I find it interesting that a place exists where one gender can be completely stereotyped by the other as being bad, selfish and even potentially harmful. Mary has a huge heart for helping women in bad circumstances and so she tries to employ single mothers, or women in abusive relationships at the school in order to give them an income and a role that can provide both confidence and comfort.

Beauty and Ruth are the cooks for the school and they are both some of the sweetest women I know. Ruth is a single mother to five children, she got a divorce from her first husband, and her second husband left her when she became pregnant with her fifth child, saying he didn’t want it. Ruth works incredibly hard to support her children, and is such a good mom. Beauty is still married but I am sad to say her husband is not a nice man, this does not deter Beauty from coming school everyday with a big smile on her face and a willingness to work, and work lovingly. I admire all of these women so much, and everyday take something new away.

Here is Mary with Angel, her baby granddaughter whom she is raising by herself.